That's right... I hit the big one. I hit the big 4-0. I know many of you out there are expecting me to say being *cough* 40 is wonderful. That it's just a number! That, 40 is the new 30.! In my opinion... NO! No it's not! I'm freakin' forty! I'm not thrilled about it, at all!
The morning that I turned 40 I looked in the mirror and immediately noticed a strange phenomenon peeking out of my right nostril. It wasn't a booger. I would've been much more content if it were a booger. But instead it was a nose hair that had actually grew beyond my nostril barrier and was in the process of looping it's self around the exterior of the bottom of my nose. Are you kidding me?!?! As I have progressed in the years, my hair growth has literally sprung up in uncalled for areas on my body and face. Since when did I have to begin plucking a hair in the middle of my FOREHEAD? Or how about my stomach? Every time I went to my doctor for my monthly prenatal visits, I was sure to keep my belly button fur at bay!
I've also noticed that it takes me a little longer to "warm up" in the mornings. Before, I could leap out of bed no problem. Now, it's more of a rolling-out-motion, with slowly standing upright. Ten minutes later, I'm good as gold.
I was hoping that on my 40th birthday my husband and sons would surprise me and shower me with gifts and affection. It did not happen. Instead we went to church, where others acknowledged my birthday with balloons, lots of candy and gifts. And every Mormon knows, having your birthday on a Sunday stinks! I didn't get to sleep in and relax. There is no celebrating with dinner at Olive Garden! Sundays are my busiest day! Steve goes to work right after church and I get to work some more! I was upset that I turned 40. I was upset that my 40th birthday was on a Sunday. And more importantly, I was upset that my own husband, whom I love dearly, did nothing. I didn't expect much. Just to feel acknowledged and cared for. Instead, the dork sat by me, as he was heading out for work, and said, "Happy birthday wifey! I thought that for your birthday I would clean the garage!" Are you kidding me? My look said it all. And he knew he messed up. He tried to make it better by adding, "Well, and other things too. You know, like dinner and movie on Friday." Too late dude. Too late.
I felt my heart sink to the pit of my stomach and tears began to well up in my eyes. "Isn't cleaning the garage, something you should be doing?", I responded. And then I followed up that tid-bit with, "I think that when you turn 40 I will clean a toilet for you!"
Does he not get it? It's not the expense or extravagance of a gift! It's the time, the effort, and the way it's presented. I told him that if he even got on my face book page and told me "happy birthday", "I love you", "thanks for cleaning the urine off of the bathroom walls and washing our funky smelling clothes for all of these years", I would have cried tears of JOY.
Forty has been hard on me. I have dipped into several episodes of bawling and attending my very own pitty parties, for the past two weeks. I will get over it and I will move on. Tomorrow I will wake up to a happy, chubby baby, a silly 5 year old boy, and admiring the young man my 15 year old son is becoming. I will laugh with my husband and still cuddle up to him on the couch as we watch another episode of COPS.
Twenty years ago, I never thought that I would have a new baby at the age of 40. I never thought that I would have 3 boys! I never thought that I would be married to a police officer. I never thought that I would be plucking hairs from my chin and FOREHEAD! I never thought that I would be as happy as I am right now. I never thought that I would be primary president and love it. I never thought that I could love my family with such intensity. And finally, I never thought I would have as many rolls in my mid section, as I do! :)
And speaking of rolls...
I just died from cuteness!