Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wiggin' out - part 2

After hosting an anticipated dinner/party/occasion, and finishing a non-stop, whirlwind session of sewing, painting, sanding, gluing and crafting, one would think that the weight of the world would have been lifted off of my shoulders. That I would return to my original sleep schedule and that the "relief" would be visible upon my face.

Not so much.

Reasons why I wasn't feeling the "relief", yet:

  1. Family was coming to stay with us, for the weekend. (I actually looked forward to my family visiting. It was the cleaning part etc. that made me want to collapse.)

  2. Conner deciding that going to bed at a reasonable time is for dummies. Who needs sleep when you can terrorize mommy in the wee hours of the MORNING?!?!?!

  3. My inner hormonal beast slowly emerging, ready to lash out at anyone and anything that was standing within 1mm of it.

All day Friday I was moving in slow motion. So tired. So PMS-y.

I tried to put Conner to bed at his "normal" bed time, but he was having none of that.

By Saturday night, I hit a wall.

And then, it happened...

Ten pm, the husband had the gall to plop down 3 pairs of his new, official pants, for his new career that he is training for and then said, "I need these shortened and hemmed!"

He was wearing one of the pairs of he new, official pants and he had attempted to roll the hem under to the height he desired.

This was my reaction:

(loud annoying sigh followed by a glare directed at the hubs)

(screaming like a holler monkey)

"I don't even know what kind of hem to do?!!?!!?!?!?!! These pants are too tight!!!!! How long do you even want them?!?!?!?!!!?!! I wore pants in the 80's that weren't this peg legged!!!!"

screaming, screaming. glaring. complaining, complaining. more screaming, a whole lot more complaining.

me some more: "You should have just let those people shorten them!!!! I don't care if it costs $50 per pair of pants!!!!!"

Oh it was ugly people! It was ugly.

Shortly after my first "wig out", the hubs left fearing for his life. Well, actually he left to go on a "ride-a-long" with his brother, for the majority of the night. I do not blame him for wanting to escape our raging, pms-ing hormone, drenched home.

"Wig out" session numero 2

This happened at 2:45 am. 2:45 in the morning. In the middle of the night.

I attempted to put Conner to bed at least 3 times. I cuddled, I set the mood (lights out, no tv etc.), I read books, I rocked him and I even stroked his hair in the hopes of my lil punk finally knocking out for the night. But he was in the mood to party. Party all night long!

Every time I put him to bed, he would escape. I finally had it! It was lights out and I put myself to bed.

While resting in my bed, I heard the familiar sounds of the escapee...

Before I knew it he was laying next to me in bed.

"Maybe he'll just fall asleep." I thought to myself. That was wishful, desperate thinking.

He repeatedly threw the covers off of me and would yell, "NIGHT!"


Wretched kid.

At that moment I didn't care what he did next. He could have stolen my car keys and drove to Vegas... I didn't care.

I was slipping in and out of sleep when I heard some tearing noises, coming from my bedroom closet.

"I don't care," I thought.

more tearing and ripping

"What the heck is he tearing in there?"

"I still don't care."

tearing, giggling, ripping, giggling

"It's probably just some papers in my church bag."

"I don't care."

lots of tearing and ripping. and some giggling.

"It could be the tissue paper from the shoe box."

"I don't care. I'm too tired."

ripping, giggling, tearing

(sigh) "Oh it's probably just the BRAND NEW Halloween pinata that I bought earlier in the day."

"Oh crap! It's the pinata that he's tearing!"

I bolted out of bed and sure enough... the new pinata, is now bald. Completely bald.


"That's it!!! You get to bed!!! I've had it!!!!"

screaming, complaining followed by an explosion of tears

My inner thoughts at that moment:

"Why me!?!?!??!!"

"I'm so tired!!!!'

blubbering, sobbing

"I hope he has a kid just like him!!!"

3 o'clock, am, my lil punk finally stayed in bed.

So you would think that after have two complete melt-downs, all of my inner demons would have no longer existed. "Demons be gone!"

But this day was just a glimpse of what was to come... the most pathetic of all, wig outs.


  1. You poor momma! That is the reason why we put a lock on Jacob's room when he was a toddler - on the outside of his door. You gotta do what you gotta do, that's all I'm saying.

  2. Awe, that sounds like my Jaimen... a little bit except for the tearing, giggling, ripping sounds. He just gets out of bed 5 times a night for me to put him back in bed and walk away, no singing, no cuddling, nothing. Why do they do this??? I don't know but I am with you, it drives me nuts! He wakes up more than his 6 month old sister!

    I do have to laugh though, because although I have not met cute little punk Conner, I can picture this happening :) and it is kinda funny to anyone other than mom.

    Oh and I to put a lock on Jaimen's door, its the childproof door thingy, on his side, so he can't get out. It used to work, I don't shut the door anymore because I wake up to blood curdling screams "MOM!!!" That wakes up sister, and makes me even more pissed than him coming into my room :)

    Good luck, and sorry about the really long novel I just wrote

  3. Oh no!! They always know how to push us down the hill! LOL!! Sorry, I laughed a little. Can't wait to see what he'll do for the photo shoot ;)

  4. Oh, Lady...I'm so sorry. I totally have days like this, more than I'd like to admit! My little bug was all about the escape not too long ago, too. He would not only launch himself out of his crib and open his door to escape, but he would also strip down and remove his diaper in the process. Yes, many fun messes for mommy to clean up. After some clever wrapping with masking tape and many nights of constantly just picking him up and putting him right back in bed, he now stays in his room.

    He will still sometimes climb out of bed and play with his toys or sing to himself, but he does stay in his room. As long as he's contained, I don't care if he stays up until 4:00am!

    Hang in there, my dear. Find a closet to lose your mind in. Or find a moment alone to take a drive and grab a beverage. There have been many episodes when I have passed cody on the front porch and said, "I have to get out, I'll be back in an hour..." Do it! It will help, I promise...loves.

  5. oh Jen, I am so sorry! Not only does Conner need to come over and play at my house, I think I need to have him over to spend the night so you can get some rest, especially when the baby comes I am sure I will be up anyway!
    Please let me know if you need anything!!!!!!

  6. Me and Tanner are laughing right now(: I hate when you get so tired that you just don't care, and can I ask where Steve is in all this? Do these men think just because they get to leave the house to go to work in the morning that that excuses them from being a daddy in the middle of the night? We women work hard all day long, too!!! But our work doesn't end when the lights go out at night. We are constantly thinking about what we need to be doing. There is no end and there is not rest!!!


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